Thursday, June 5, 2008
Summer Movie Smackdown!
For some reason, while the films this summer may not have the most quality, there are a hell of a lot of them. For once, I actually feel like seeing most of them as well. So, I've decided to have a little fun with it and do up a summer movie elimination bracket ala the NCAA. Feel free to make your own brackets and submit them, or hold onto mine and use it yourself. While I did have a hard time finding 16 movies I wanted to see this summer, you may want to drop it down to 8. Anyway, here it is. I'll update as certain battles get a winner.
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Well My friend, once again you have inspired me (probably to my wallet and sanity's greater detriment, but thats my own fall for not having a stronger will I think) to follow in your cinema-geek foot steps. I must concure that this is a truly great summer for movies. Its like living in interesting times, but in a positive way. I haven't been this excited about a time in movie release history since the 2-3 years of Matrix/Starwars/Lord of the Rings back to back releases. So with out further ado I will recite my movie lineup. I appologize for mine not being in cool graphic format but I've absolutely NO idea how to do that on my computer.
I've got what I consider the summers two biggest comicbook heavy hitters back to back, Iron Man Vs. Hulk (its like Marvel Capcom!). The Incredible Hulk is going to have to truly shine to beat the invicible Iron Man here. I will say the one edge over Iron Man I think Hulk will have, is that his is not an origin story the narative can hit the ground (and smashy action) running.
Next up is The Happening Vs. X-files: I want to Believe. This is a tough one for me. I put this up against each other because they are both erie paranormal stories. I do realy love M. Night's movies and think he will make a truly shocking rated R flick. On the other hand, I nearly blew my X-nerd wad when I saw the trailer for X-files: I want to believe. We shall see.
The next first duo of flix are two I don't really care that much about, but maybe at least one of them will get my motor running rather than stall me out. We got Speed Racer Vs. Death Race. Which ever wins (and it maybe come down to box office on this one for me, cause I honestly am not excited about either one) I think the next duo will win: The Strangers Vs. Midnight Meat Train.
These are my two horror movies for the summer (not counting any horrific scenes in Happenings). On the one hand, Strangers looks truly truly creepy and frightening. On the other hand, Meat Train has a train, filled with meat, butchered by none other than Vinnie Jones (Bullete Tooth Tony himself!). So its anyones quess as to who will slash their way to the finish line between these two.
Now we come to the comedy portion of our selections. Get Smart Vs. the Love Guru. While I do think Mike Myers is hilarious, the nostalgic childhood lover of "Get Smart" is leaning toward it as the front runner in this race. It could be very close though and if things come down to a nose then I think Steve Carell may win.
Now to the pulpy/ tongue in cheak adventure portion of our selection. Hellboy 2 Vs. The Mummy 3. I love both of these franchises. Yes at first when I heard it was a chinese mummy in Mummy 3 I was like "what? No, no no...it must be Egyptian mummy" I saw the trailer and it looks good. Yet, Hellboy!! The first one made my first runner up for top 3 best comicbook superhero movies of all times (only missing out because my mind categorizes Hellboy in a different class than people like Batman and the X-men). I'm leaning towards Hellboy 2 in this fight. I'm secretly hoping though that Mummy 3 will blow me away with how its just as awsome as its trailer is telling me it is. I'm so torn on this one I feel like I'm having my own private civil war. The good part is no matter which side wins, Ironfury wins!
Now we come to the The Dark Knight Vs. Hancock. I've been waiting so impatiently for the new Batman movie, and when I honestly think about it I'm pretty sure it will win in this race. But if thats the outcome, I think I will have a good time giving Hancock a shot at the next round. Hancock looks like what I hoped Superman Returns would be more like, and what I STILL hope Superman The Man of Steel WILL be like. Only downside of this movie, is its linkage to a Scientologist which means I'll have to be sifting the narative for scientological propaganda.
Ok and finally we come to the dross. Indy 4 Vs. Kung Fu Panda. I think I may end up seeing one or both of these with my mom, and frankly I think they both can go fry in hotoil, but maybe I'll be suprised. If nothing else I've given an almost guaranteed automatic move to the next round for Dark Knight or Hancock. Ok, so thats my line up. Whats your thoughts folks?
Barron Ironfury out!
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